ETIQUETTE

Disabled people prefer their disabilities to be irrelevant as they move about in social situations. Judge the person as if the disability were not present. The best advice is to relax and be yourself.

Steps:

  1. Relax.
  2. Smile.
  3. Be open-minded in your approach.
  4. Remember most people using wheelchairs are not chronically ill.
  5. Speak directly to the person in the wheelchair rather than to any companion.
  6. Look at the person when you talk, rather than at the wheelchair.
  7. Sit at the person's level if the conversation will be an extended one.
  8. Remember the wheelchair is part of the user's personal space.
  9. Understand the person regards the wheelchair in the same way you think about your car: it is simply a tool for mobility.
  10. People using wheelchairs realize children are curious. If a child asks a question you feel is embarrassing, don't chastise the child. Let the disabled person handle the situation.
  11. A polite offer of help is acceptable if the situation warrants it. For example, many wheelchair users find opening doors awkward.

Tips: It's normal to be curious as to why someone uses a wheelchair, but let the subject come up naturally. Colloquialisms like, “I've got to be running along,” come naturally to everyone. You'll notice disabled people also use them as part of their routine conversations.

Things NOT to say: “What's wrong with you?” is a question no one wants to hear. The wheelchair is not the person. A person has a disability rather than being a disabled person - “normal” is not the opposite of “disabled.” People “use” wheelchairs rather than being “wheelchair-bound” or “confined to a wheelchair.” If you're curious about the wheelchair itself, ask directly, but remember not to handle it like a car on display at a dealership.